Don't Piss Off The Cook!!

"Don't piss off the cook! Why would anyone ever want to piss off the person who is cooking their food?!!" That is what our cook said to me (with great feeling) during the game a few nights back. And I had to agree with him- and not just because he was an angry guy brandishing a large knife, though that may have had a small effect. But let's back up a bit.

It is a Saturday night with a big crowd; a nice warm evening, and lots of people have come to the ballbark for the game. We know it is going to be busy, so going into the evening we are preparing as best we can- wrapping 100 hot dogs before the game, 2 cases of nachos prepped, extra soft pretzels ordered, extra staff on to help with the rush. But there is only so much you can do, because no one wants cold or stale food, and after the first big rush, we were working fast to keep up with the orders. That is when the problem starts.

We have run out of prepared burgers, so our cook is frying more burgers up on the grill, and one of our teenage helpers is prepping the buns and condiments. A couple of college age kids are waiting impatiently for their burgers. "C'mon man! We're missing the game! How long does it take to make a flippin' burger?" and "How come you don't have them made already! You know people are going to be in here wanting them!" The cook is ignoring them, as he has heard it all before, and doesn't really get rattled. I talk to the guys: "relax guys. you would rather have hot burgers than ones that have been sitting here for an hour cold. It will be about 5 minutes." That mollified them for at least, oh, 30 seconds. "C'MON dude! This is BS! You got 30 people in line waiting and you can't even get burgers cooked! What's your problem, man?!"

THAT got the cook's attention. He whips around from his grill, "what did you say? Do I come to your job and tell you how to do it? You think you can come back here and cook these burgers quicker?" Time for me to step in. I tell the cook to finish up the burgers, and I face the guys. "Look- you fussing about this isn't going to make the burgers get done any quicker. I apologize for the wait, but it is busy and we are working as quickly as we can. There are 2 other grills if you want to try to get a burger there instead."
"But then we would have to wait in line all over again."
(Now you've got it, Einstein)
"Yes, you would. It is your choice. If you choose to wait here, please be courteous and let us get you and everyone else waited on as quickly as possible."

I turn back to the cook, who is still ready to carve out their spleens with his cutlery. Quietly to me he says "do they know what I could do to their food before I could give it to them? I could -...". OK, we will edit that part. You really don't want to know, do you? Trust me on this one. Of course, it didn't happen, and the burgers were done, we got through the rush more or less intact, and the cook settled back down to his normal happy self.

But in every business you work for, there are always 'cooks', aren't there? The people who do the real heavy lifting that make your business run. They are also the people who probably make less money, get recognized the least, and catch the most heat when things go wrong. They are taken for granted every day because we tend not to notice them because they always get the job done quietly and efficiently. Unless things go wrong. Then it is all too easy for a manager to jump in and start affixing blame.

In my banking career the 'cooks' were the input clerks and the loan funders. The two most critical jobs in the business- getting applications input, and getting the loans paid out to the dealers. When things got crossed up there, the customers were on the phone. These people are among the lower paid employees in the business. They work very hard, they do a great job, and the only time you hear about them is if something goes wrong. When there were problems, it was usually beyond their control; bad applications, bad loan packages. But people want their burgers NOW, so they would get the grief.

As a manager, I always tried to recognize this, and look for the breakdown in the process rather than figure out who to blame. If the process is efficient, a lot of these situations can be avoided. And sometimes the line is too long, and you just have to deal with the customers who have to wait in line. It is just a function of being in business. Your resources are deployed for certain parameters of business. When business exceeds that, you just have to muddle through, and when it is done, see what you can do to improve the process to meet your customers', and your employees' needs, so you do a better job next time.

Well, we got back ahead of the customers at the grill, and by and large it was a successful evening, and eventually it slowed down, and I got to take my meal break. I have to admit., though, when I had the cook make me a burger, I casually stood around and watched him. Not for any particular reason, mind you, not at all. Just those words in my mind..."Don't piss off the cook....".

Next up, a sordid tale of supply and demand... Dollar Beer Night.